


i didnt mean to hurt u

by foureyes12



Category: Newsies!: the Musical - Fierstein/Menken
Genre: Angst, F/M, M/M, O, character death mentioned but no detail is gone int, violence mentioned but no detail is gone into
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-04
Updated: 2015-06-04
Packaged: 2018-04-02 22:30:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4076173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foureyes12/pseuds/foureyes12
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack has been in witness protection since he was a kid. Now he has to move away again for his own safety.</p>
            </blockquote>





	i didnt mean to hurt u

**Author's Note:**

> thank you sooooo much to the amazing spotconlonsarms and newsies-in-onesies at tumblr for beta reading this. i couldnt have done it without you!

Jack trailed his fingers over the mantelpiece that had held pictures of him, Davey, and Katherine just moments ago, before he ripped them all out of their frames and burned them. It was better this way, he kept telling himself. They were safer, he was safer. No matter what he did he still felt wretched. He hadn’t gone to work this morning. Instead, he had left as usual and then waited for Katherine and Davey to leave too. Then he had let himself back into their apartment and shoved everything he owned into a suitcase. After that, he removed any other trace that he lived here. Burning pictures, trashing his paintings, that sort of thing. As he did this something inside him broke, and he decided he wouldn’t start any relationships or close friendships wherever he went next. It wasn’t worth the wreckage he would inevitably leave in his wake. Yesterday the FBI had told him he needed to leave, but now it seem as if ages had past. Through the gloom of misery and dejection the only clear thought in his head was that witness protection sucked. 

He had only been eight when he had watched under-the-table deals being formed between his father and Snyder. He knew that his father had borrowed a large amoun of money from him and hidden it somewhere. Jack had watched Snyder kill his father trying to find out where it was. Then Snyder had turned on Jack, convinced that the kid knew where the money was. The police had arrived but not in time to catch Snyder. Ever since then Jack had been bouncing from place to place with a new name each time Snyder came close to him. Francis Sullivan went to Billy Howard to John Massey to Robert Collins until he was finally allowed to settle on Jack Kelly. As Jack Kelly, he had made lots of friends, even a boyfriend and a girlfriend. It had been years since Snyder found him, and yet he still didn’t tell any of his newfound friends in fear that the knowledge would somehow put them in danger too. So when the news came from a recent arrestee that Snyder was closing in on him again, Jack left with a note that did nothing to reveal his true aims, as he was shipped off to California under the name Dan Pickett.

When he came home from work that day Davey was distraught. All of Jack’s paintings that had hung in the hallway were missing. Thinking someone had broke in, he ran into the apartment where he noticed a trend. All the missing things were either Jack’s or had Jack pictured in them in some way. That was when his eyes fell on the envelope lying on the table. With shaking hands Davey unlocked his phone and started to dial Katherine’s number.

“Hey Kath? You need to come to the apartment right now.”

Katherine was technically still meant to be at work, but the quiver in Davey’s voice had her grabbing her stuff and running out the door. The same shock that had overcome Davey entered her body as she reached their apartment.

“What happened here?”

“Something gives me the feeling that if we open that we’ll find out.” Davey answered, pointing towards the envelope. “I didn’t want to open it without you.”

“Well I’m here now.” Katherine said grabbing the envelope. They both made their way to the couch and sat down, curling into each other to see the letter better.

“Dear Kath and Davey,

Once you realize what I’ve done you’ll probably hate me, but I’ve decided to follow my dream and go try my luck in Santa Fe. I don’t think a long distance relationship would work, so I’ve removed any reminders of me to help you forget me. You’ll thank me for this one day, when you’re living happily, together. Don’t give up on each other.

Jack”

Disbelieving, the two figures reading the letter leaned into each other even more. They sat there frozen until the next morning.

“We need to tell the others. They were his friends too, they need to know.” Davey whispered to Katherine.

“I know. I’ll text them to meet us in the cafe down the block tonight,” Katherine said as she looked around for her phone. “For now do you just want to wallow and cry some more?”

“Yes, please.”

At the same time as Davey and Katherine were trying to cope, Jack was sitting staring out the window of a car. He had never felt such despair about having to change locations. Sure, it had always sucked, but he had never left behind so many relationships, or such close ones. As his thoughts drifted, he felt the pull of the distance between him and his friends as they drove on. Jack would do so much for all of his friends, even abandon them, he realized sardonically. He’d do anything to make sure everyone was safe.

His thoughts continued to wander further into the past. He remembered carefully arranging, the now-destroyed pictures on the mantelpiece. All the little, ordinary moments with Davey and Katherine meant so much more to him now, so he closed his eyes and tried to swarm his senses with these moments. The smell of Katherine’s shampoo. The sound of Davey’s laugh. Lying tangled up with them on the couch. 

He reached up to touch his cheek where Katherine had kissed him goodbye this morning and with surprise found that it was wet. Jack hadn’t even noticed that he had started to cry. Figuring that he had already lost his composure in front of the officer traveling with him, he might as well let go of his emotions. Jack continued to to cry as he explored the small moments he still had stored in his brain. He wondered how Katherine and Davey would react to him leaving. How all his friends would react. They should hate him. They would hate him. He would hate himself. He did hate himself for leaving. If he were any of his friends he would hate himself even more. They had no idea why he left, and would never have any idea why he left.

As the car moved on Jack started to sob. He wasn’t happy about it. Showing this type of emotion meant Snyder was affecting him. All the progress Jack had made to cut that man out of his life was being washed away by his tears. As he thought back on his life and all the different places and names he’d had, Jack thought it was odd that he felt that the name Jack Kelly was more his than his birth name. He decided that if Snyder was ever caught and he was ever allowed to leave witness protection, he would somehow get his name changed to Jack Kelly permanently.

After days of traveling he had finally reached his new apartment in California. He had tried to sleep in the bed on the first night and ended up migrating to the couch. Jack did this every night for weeks. The bed was too small, yet also too empty. After a few months, he managed to sleep in the bed, but it still felt empty with only one body lying in it. Jack had gotten a job at a restaurant, doubling as a street artist during his time off. Though his days fell into a pattern he had vowed never to make close friends again.

Davey and Katherine had their own difficulties coping with Jack’s absence. Katherine threw herself into her journalism, often forgetting that her body needed food and drink. As a result, Davey often ended up trailing behind her to remind her. The most difficult part for both of them was sleeping. Jack used to sprawl out and take up as much space as he could, acting as some sort of pillow, while they slept. Now the bed just felt to big for both of them. Most of the time they curled into each other on the couch now.

After seeing Davey and Katherine’s tired yawns one too many times their friends decided enough was enough. 

“Wh-what is going on here?” Davey asked as he and Katherine entered their apartment that was filled to the brim with all their friends.

“This is an intervention”

“A what? Someone please explain what's happening.”

Crutchie stepped forward “You are getting a smaller bed or so help me god I will demolish that stupid couch you’re both sleeping on with only my crutch”

“How are our sleeping habits any of your business?” Katherine snapped.

“They’re our business cause you two are our friends” Race spoke up, “We get it you miss him. We do to. You may miss him more than us but we still get what you’re feeling. We’ve all lost a great damn friend. Hell, it took us ages to get Crutchie off that roof he and Jack sat on to stare at the stars. He’s basically lost his brother, but he’s letting us help. We need you to let us help.”

Katherine visibly deflated “Ok?” she whispered looking towards Davey.

“Ok” he responded quivering.

Slowly they got better. They still felt the hole Jack had left in their relationship everyday. They had each other though, and they were happy and content with that. They were happy with the dates they went on, and the life they were living. It wasn’t the one they pictured a year ago but they were pleased with what they had.

About a year after Jack left, it was time for the annual Jacobs' summer holiday. Mrs. Jacobs, Mr. Jacobs, Les, Sarah, Davey, and for the first time, Katherine, prepared to spend a week by the beach in California. Hotels had been booked, beach plans had been made and fun times were ahead. As they drove through the city for the first time Davey glanced out the car window, just as they passed a street artist.

“Jack!” he exclaimed, shocked at the similarity of the artist’s features to his ex-boyfriend’s.

“Davey, are you alright?” Katherine asked carefully. Neither of them had mentioned their ex in months now.

“I’m fine. I thought I saw him outside. It was only some street artist. I’m probably just tired from the journey and imagining things.” Davey reassured her.

Even though they acted like everything was alright in front of Davey’s family, both of them were uneasy now. When they went to bed that night they clung to each other tighter than they had in a long time. The next morning everything seemed alright again. They all spent the day at the beach and had an all-around great time. Both Katherine and Davey had suppressed thoughts of the fluke from the day before.

The next day the family divided up. Les demanded to go to the beach again, while Davey and Katherine left in favour of touring a museum that had caught their interest while Katherine was researching before their trip. Afterwards, they decided to go to a restaurant and get some late lunch.

Jack was having a day from hell at work. No one had tipped well at all, the weather was hot as hell and he just had to clean up after a puking baby. Finally the lunch crowd had shuffled out of the restaurant, but just as he started to sit down and take his break his co-worker informed him that there were new customers sitting at one of his tables. Sighing, he stood up and walked towards the young couple that had just entered the restaurant.

“Hi! I’m Dan and I’ll be your server today…” his usual introduction faltered as his eyes fell on Katherine and Davey. One simple sentence he probably said a thousand times a day pulled a healing wound back open.

“Jack!” they exclaimed in unison.

“You must have me confused with someone else. I’m Dan.” Jack said putting on what he hoped was a smile not a grimace. Thank god, he’d always been a decent actor.

“What's your problem Kelly? You don’t have to pretend to be someone else! If you didn’t want to have anything to do with us you could have just told us!” 

Alright, so Katherine had always been able to see through him in a second. “C’mon Davey we’re leaving. We’ll eat somewhere else!” Katherine continued pulling her shocked boyfriend out of his seat and out the door.

“Wow! You nailed that, didn’t you? What did you say to them?” Jack’s co-worker said jokingly.

“Nothing” he muttered in response.

Katherine and Davey tried to pretend everything was alright for the sake of Davey’s family, but they were both shaken by the encounter. They tried to go back and find Jack to get some answers, but he was nowhere to be found. Jack had quit his job and did his best to avoid them for the rest of the week while searching for more work.

At the end of the week, Katherine and Davey went back home. When they told their story to the rest of their friends everyone’s faces fell.

“I just don’t understand why he would do this.” Crutchie muttered.

“And why was he in Cali when he said he was going to Santa Fe?” Race asked.

“I dunno. Jack Kelly doesn’t make much sense anymore. Not that he did to start with.” Spot responded.

A month later Snyder had found Jack again. This time there was no tip off. Snyder’s men quickly plucked him off the street and brought him back to their boss. The cops had found him before Snyder killed him. Jack didn’t remember much after the police arrived but he knew he had been brought to a hospital. When he came to the first thing he asked for was his phone. He needed to hear Katherine and Davey. He needed to make sure they were really ok. Then he would start to believe he was really ok. He punched in the home phone number as fast as he could before faltering. What would he even tell them. “Hey guys. Guess what? The dude thats been chasing me since I was a kid is dead now. Wanna get back together?” No that was stupid. It was also selfish of him to think they would want him back. They had obviously moved on, and were pissed as hell at him as their last encounter proved. No he would meet them in person and explain. They deserved that. Then he would leave. They didn’t need him.

Another month went on and Katherine and Davey fell back into their pattern. Until one night in December, when there was a knock on their door. Katherine went to go open it, thinking it was Specs who had left his spare glasses at their apartment earlier.

“You know, normal people usually give a heads up before coming by so la- Jack.” her cheerful statement fell short upon seeing Jack with his arm in a sling outside her door.

“Sorry, I didn’t have your number anymore. I wasn’t even sure if you still lived here.” Jack said quietly.

“Davey, come over here.” Katherine called over her shoulder.

“Why do you sound so serious? Who’s at the door?” Davey joked before he saw Jack and took a sharp breath. “What do you want here.”

Jack took a deep breath “Look I know you probably don’t want me here, and I can understand that, Hell, I wouldn’t want me here if I were you. I’m only here to explain, I owe that to you now that I’m able to.”

“What do you mean now that you can explain?” Katherine asked.

“It’s kind of a long story” Jack responded, rubbing his neck.

“Come in.”

So Jack stepped into an apart that just over a year ago had felt like home, now he felt out of place, like he was invading someones territory. After they all settled on the couch he explained his story. How he’d been in witness protection since he was a child. How he thought he was keeping them safe by not telling them anything. How he had felt most happy was when he was Jack Kelly and now that Snyder had finally been arrested he wanted to explain himself to them.

“Not telling us anything was dumb as shit.” Katherine commented after Jack had finished his story “We would have been more useful if we were in the know.”

“Yeah, I guess I was just being stupid.” Jack said with a sad smile. “I’ll let myself out.”

“Jack, wait!” Davey called out after him. “What you did was senseless but given the situation I can understand why.” He hesitated before he continued. “It would take some work, but I’m willing to try again if Kath is.”

Jack looked carefully between them, not daring to let hope come into his eyes.

“I’m happy to try again as long as there are no more secrets” Katherine said after a moment.

“Yeah, I’d like that” Jack said unable to suppress a grin. “No more secrets.”

When Katherine stepped into the cafe where her friends met once a month to catch up Darcy welcomed her.

“So what up?” he asked handing Katherine her usual coffee.

“Guess who Davey and I found outside our front door last night?” she asked with a grin.

“Chris Evans!”   
“No-what the hell, Darce?” she exclaimed catching Romeo’s attention.

“Whats going on here?” he asked butting into their conversation.

“Kath and Davey found someone outside their apartment but she’s making me guess who.” Darcy complained “It’s not Chris Evans”

“Ooh. Was it one of your long lost twins?” a voice from the back of the room piped up.

“No. It was me.” Jack said quietly from the front door he and Davey had just entered.

Jack was immediately met with an accusation from a boy he used to call brother “What are you doing here Kelly? I thought you were partying it up in California.”

“First of all, witness protection is in no way ‘partying it up’ and second of all I just want to explain to you guys. Dave and Kath let me explain and accepted it. They did call me an idiot which is fair enough I guess”

“Alright start explaining” Crutchie stopped his rambling, wanting to know why his best friend had left.

“Well it all started when I was a kid...”

They ended up agreeing that Jack was and idiot but willing to give him a second chance. For the first time in a long while Jack finally felt at home again.


End file.
